Lunch with a dollop of venting

Ok so lunch happened around 12:45pm and was relatively simple: 1 cup soup with 1 bite of a white bread roll and the ciabatta roll that I purchased to dip in my soup (carbs+soup=my undying grattitude and friendship)

Picture right here:

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It was good and I love soup. That’s the truth of it all. I think soup has everything you need in a meal: grains, meats, veggies and liquids. it’s dense and keeps you full. The only catch with it is the sodium content, but if you add a glass of water, like I did, you should be ok.

Now can I just vent a little about life. It’s  a sidenote but I need an outlet and if I can’t use my blog as an outlet, then what do I have (well aside from a boyfriend, family and friends–but that’s besides the point). I just want to say that women frustrate me. There’s nothing scarier to me than a group of women. All my life I have been around boys: my two brothers + three male cousins+ three sons of close family friends+ all of their friends= LOTS of boys. And I like being the girl in that dynamic. To me, a lot of the time, boys are easier to read than women. they tell you how they feel You know if they like you or not. You don’t play many games with them most of the time. They for the most part show you how they feel. They’re not judgey or clickey in groups or at least they don’t fake judgements. I was an unattractive young adult (as are we all). But I was always the female best friend amongst these guys and since none of them were trying to date me, things were pretty harmonious. They didn’t ignore me or make fun of my clothes or say I was ugly. They just didn’t take me seriously as a woman and treated me as one of the guys. to this day, I feel a WHOLE LOT more comfortable with men than women. Of course now the problem is that I’m a prettier woman and so men don’t see me as “one of the guys” any more—but that is besides the point. The reason why I’m venting now is that I hate having to work under the authority of a bunch of women in their twenties (late) who are super cliquey and judgey. I just get bitchy comments from them (like one will say something snide, and the others wil laugh) and they’re super ultra friendly with eachother, but cold to me. The problem here is that they’re higher up on the totem pole than me so I can either leave or stay. And I have to stay because this is really worthwhile to me. But with men, I know if they didn’t like my performance, I’d know so and there wouldn’t be these games. I also get judged a lot for my looks and my skin color and I hate it. I just feel really uncomfortable with women and sometimes wish I was working with men. But the problem there is that last summer I was working with a dude doctor who repeatedly came on to me. and that was NOT OK. So men suck too. Bollocks! I guess what I’m trying to say here is that regardless of gender, I want people to be upfront with me and not be snarky, or catty, or mean, or ass-like. Can’t people just tell eachother how they feel. I hate the clique mentality and always have. Now I’m off to take a deep breath and move on with my life….

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